Spouse has a very important role to play for tobacco cessation. Here I am only addressing the wife! There would be conflicts I have patients where the husband came to know about his wife’s habit post marriage. Traditionally Indians do not ask about the tobacco habits and even if they do the husbands would usually lie, or say “I will Quit-I promise”. A promise which is hard to keep.
Sufferings of an Indian Lady whose husband smokes –
- Have to manage with foul smelling husband
- Keep cleaning the washrooms, bedrooms etc.
- Cleaning the stains on his clothes (In India it is wife’s job!)
- Infertility and dis-balanced sexual life
- Finance and economic dis balance
- Caretaker when the husband who is often ill because of his tobacco habit
- Taking care of family when husband is no more or crippled because of illness
- Passive smoking or tobacco chewing affects
- Suffer illness (hypertension, COPD, Wrinkling of skin etc)
- Infective disease – Tuberculosis
- Complicated diseases like cancer, cardiac, stroke
- The Future generation may be crippled
A LADY SUFFERS FOR NO MISTAKE OF HERS
Different type of wives when it comes to the tobacco habit of their husband
- Helpless and suffering – the Indian traditional wives. She is aware of the harms of tobacco but cannot get the husband to understand or quit.
- Ignorant and accepts as it is. Not aware of the harms of tobacco as because it has been used traditionally in her family too
- Partners – starts using tobacco along with him.
- Firm – She is aware of the harms and firm with her husband and pushes him to rectify his habit
- Quarreling – keeps scolding but does nothing about his tobacco use
- Helping – learns the various methods of quitting and takes the husband to doctors, help him quit
NAGGING – because of frustration and suffering at some point of time this would show up and become a part of the relationship. This may have a negative affect and the husband may become more adamant.
TAKE ACTION
A newly wed wife has to take immediate action once she comes to know about the spouse’s disease. If it is accepted in the beginning, but slowly it becomes a chronic issue and gets more difficult to treat as time passes.
The challenge is getting support, tobacco use is so rampant and accepted in the society that she does not get family support. But being firm and knowledgeable helps.
How to know:
There are tell-tale signs of tobacco use whether smoking or chewing
- Stains on teeth and /or lips
- Bad foul smelly breaths
- Constant coughing
- Stains on nail beds, fingers
- Foul smelly hairs and cloths
Some behavioral aspects that one needs to notice
- Chewing gums – constant use
- Frequently disappearing
- Going for a walk avoiding you
- Friend circle
Laboratory and Qualitative assessment
- Laboratory tests are available for confirmation of tobacco use (Cotinine Test)
- Qualitative assessment of present health assessment
It is important that one should know and decide before tying the knot. Tobacco is a disease and you do not want to be wedded to a diseased person. Either he takes treatment and is cured for at least 6 months or he is not the right choice for you.
Help is available. Tobacco as a disease needs intensive treatment. ICanCaRe Tobacco Wellness Centers and Online Tobacco Wellness program are just a call away. ICanCaRe team of Certified tobacco Cessation Specialists and Quit Coaches work with you to make your journey smooth, easy, interesting and achievable.
The ICanCaRe Tobacco Wellness Program incorporates evidence-based protocol digitalized intervention program which is both medically validated and scientific in its nature. It is data driven and has given a success rate of 92%.
ICanCaRe Tobacco Wellness Centres with its India’s first digital protocol-based assessment process guide intervention as per requirements.
Do visit the ICanCaRe Tobacco Wellness Centres or register online by visiting our page or call ICanCaRe quit line 011-430-77695.
